DAMNTHEDUMBDASH

Each time i see you. The heart of mine just keeps aching. I regretted not having the guts, regretted being a scaredy cat, regretted not letting my feelings made known. And now, look what'd happened? If i could have just said it earlier, everything would have been different. I miss the month July in year 2007, the time when everything happened. We behaved as though no one was around. You knew what was going on, but didn't say anything. I didn't listen to anyone who commented and gave critics. I just knew it was you. The one who brings the smile on my face everyday. Everytime i do something not rightful and not suppose to do, you just allowed me to carry on and not say anything. I believe you felt something. It was some other people who told you different stories, some other people who freaking controlled your mind, some other people who thought what we were doing was wrong, then our relations drifted. I stopped doing what i did. I thought what i did was best for us. But then i realised. It's good for you and bad for me. I All i wish for now, is for time to go back. When we could start all over again, and spend the times we always spend together. I wouldn't mind making any sacrifices, it all didn't matter. Just that one time, when i could tell you how i felt. And you responded. No matter what the answer would be would not even matter to me. Now this urge and sensation of telling you how i feel keeps coming. But i just cannot let it out. Because if i do, it's DOOMDAY. while, seeing you with your partner hurts sometimes, but guess what? as long as you're happy with him, it's fine. really, it is. Maybe i'm thinking too much. But you're trying to, i don't know? but what you're doing, is just so hurtful! everytime i want to give you something, i will have to stop myself and give it to someone else because i can't. i really can't continue to do that already. i'm glad that you remembered the times we spent last year. and wearing that _ during the meal. you even remembered what i said to you last year. did it make an impact? i hope it did. whatever you're doing now, just don't hurt yourself alright. i'm happy for you, i really am. i'll still be standing here, watching you.

people who figured out this message, DON'T ANYHOW THINK UH. what you're thinking, not confirmed then ask me. i may or may not tell you.